Monday, August 04, 2008

Some Thoughts on "The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor"

My first question is, who thought making this movie was a good idea? Seriously, was there really anybody out there clamoring for another Mummy movie?

Well apparently there were, because Universal just cranked out another one, and it feels like it just came off an assembly line and the quality control person fell asleep. It's terrible.

My second question is: a heroic band of fighting yeti? Really?

To be honest, I actually enjoyed the original two, they weren't great movies but they were goofy fun. Tomb of the Dragon Emperor is just soulless product, churned out to make a quick buck.

Whatever happened to suspense in movies of this sort? Everything is plotted out ahead of time, following the easy connect the dots to the inevitable plot points to the foregone conclusion without ever making it seem as if the characters are in any real danger. You could accuse Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull of the same thing, but at least it always felt like Spielberg knew what he was doing. Not so much here, director Rob Cohen almost seems bored by his own movie. And the original Indiana Jones films are textbooks on how to do this type of thing right, but Cohen seems to ignore it all, taking the connect the dots plot and scribbling it in with a crayon. He treats the audience like morons (most notably in the written postscript, which has to be one of the most awkwardly insulting pieces of summer pandering I have ever seen...does he think we're all idiots or is that just who the movie was made for?), and the entire movie is just a silly hack job. Thank god The Dark Knight topped it for another weekend at the box office.

Full review coming Thursday.

8 comments:

Fletch said...

To answer your question: yes, the movie was made for idiots.

Jaccstev said...

Great reviews. For me, I just came in to watch it without any great expectations. But still, the film only made me boring by its hollowness.

J.D. said...

I was kinda clamoring for a third one, but the version in my head had RACHEL WEISZ. So fuck this.

Matthew Lucas said...

They even make a really lame joke about it not being Rachel Weisz, when somebody asks Evey if the character in her Mummy book is based on her she looks up (this is the first time we see her face) and says "I can honestly say she is a totally different person."

Cue eye-roll here.

Daniel G. said...

This franchise will. not. die.

I haven't seen one since the first installment, but glad to know I'm not missing anything in between.

Roman J. Martel said...

Yeah the fact that Cohen was at the helm of this one really made me doubt that there was going to be much to enjoy. I haven't found his movies to be nearly as fun as he seems to think they are.

As for the Mummy series, the first was the best one. It felt like it was made with fun in mind. The second one felt a bit soulless to me, especially with the kid thrown in there, and the character change in Evey.

Sam Juliano said...

Complete and utter GARBAGE, but all the respondants (including yourself) here have said as much. My wife took my kids to see it, but I took a pass. They didn't even like it. LOL.

Matthew Lucas said...

"Complete and utter GARBAGE"

Amen Sam.